Do you watch Antiques Roadshow? It’s one of the few TV shows that Mr. Andi and I both enjoy. In particular, I love the stories of people who found an old painting/sculpture/lamp/whatever at a flea market or covered in dust in an antique shop, took one look at it and realized they’d found something special. Sometimes, the treasure seeker talks of how his spouse mocked him for the purchase. But he knew he had something special. He was just waiting for someone else to see it, too.
Last weekend, Mr. Andi went fishing with some friends. The kids and I ran a few errands and then headed to a local restaurant for burgers (Sarah Kate), chicken (Nathan) and fried shrimp (me). We were seated near the door, a perfect location for Nathan to smile at everyone who came in or out. Most people smiled back, and a few spoke to him. One lady in particular took a special interest in Nathan. We’ve encountered what I call The Linger before – when people hang around him, making idle chit chat, and finally mention that they have a family member with Down syndrome.
While she was speaking to us, another man who was with her walked up and talked to Nathan, as well. Sure enough, the man’s daughter/woman’s granddaughter is nine years old and has Down syndrome. She came in a few minutes later, adorable in her slim glasses (I love kids in glasses!) Both the woman and the man fussed and fawned over Nathan, and the man asked permission to take his picture. He asked Nathan if he wanted to go home with him, and Nathan extended his arms toward the man in affirmation.
About two dozen people walked by Nathan before this family came in. Almost all of them noticed him. Many smiled at him. A few even took time to briefly acknowledge him by saying “hey there” or telling me how cute he is. But they all went on their way – home to watch television, to the counter to order their meal, or to their table to eat their fried seafood.
This family – which by now had grown to include mom, dad, daughter, and various other relatives – sat down behind us and we spent the rest of our meal visiting and sharing. The man told me how glad he was to meet another local family whose lives had been touched by Down syndrome. It was getting late, so we said our goodbyes and exchanged numbers. I headed out and the man helped me out to the car. After I buckled Nathan into the car seat, the man waved and told Nathan goodbye.
The man reminded me of the people I see on Antiques Roadshow. He saw what others didn’t. He knew that he’d found a rare treasure. A steady stream of people passed Nathan by, but this man stopped and examined him, taking special note of his unique features – the almond eyes and the palmar crease that make my son a priceless work of art.
I had an experience one day when leaving church an older lady came running at me and I thought she was in a hurry to leave but instead she came to see my baby girl and tell me what an amazing gift I had been given. She then went on to tell me how she had a 25 year old son with Down Syndrome and he had just gotten his own apartment and she told me what an amazing future my baby girl will have and what amaze things she will teach her older sisters and everyone that is involved in her life. It was something that took me back a little because I wasn’t sure how to react. It was probably one of the more positive experiences I had received outside of our family and very close friends, but now that Lacey has gotten older she can draw the attention to her in a positive light because everyone she meets just says she is a ray of “Sunshine”. Her smile will light up a room, doctors office, hospital, grocery store. You name it I have seen her turn a many upside down smiles up.
Nathan is the same way – smiles for everyone, all around! A lady at our church had a son with Ds who died, and she always makes a special point to smile, touch, or speak to us and/or Nathan at church. I don’t even know her last name, but I feel that she’s my sister, just the same.
How lovely for you and now you have a new family with whom to be friends, not because they have a special needs child but because they are caring loving people. Great post as always. 🙂
Our daughter also shares Nathan’s wonderful extra chromosome. She brings smiles to many people’s faces with her absolute joy of life. I’ve had a few people stop me and tell me how their lives were touched by someone with DS, and it brings a tear to my eyes every time. I never get tired of being told how wonderful she is, because I tuck those moments away in my heart for the times when it’s more difficult. But oh, how I love my beautiful girl with the amazing almond-shaped eyes.
We get that, too, Jen – it’s such a precious gift to have someone tell you how wonderful people with Ds are. So sad that so many people in the world don’t appreciate it.
Andi:
It was a pleasure meeting you and your wonderful children that night. My wife and I love meeting other families who are fortunate enough to have a child with Down syndrome.
Savannah is the light that guides us. She is more than we could have ever wanted in a child…bright, charismatic, loving, and forgiving. I am envious of the way she sees the world, and in awe of how brave she is. Her life has been challenging, but she never complains, she just smiles and jumps the hurdles life puts in front of her. I am sure Nathan has that same spirit….one that us mortals will never have.
I hope we can keep in touch.
John Chaulk
Thank you for stopping by, John. I hope you don’t mind that I put Savannah’s picture up on the site. It was wonderful to meet you and I’m so glad that we’ve found your family.
We are very happy to have Savannah’s picture on your site.
Andi, September 18,2010
It was a pleasure meeting you and you wonderful family. I am one of Savannah’s Grandmother’s that was with her that night! She has such loving parents and Grandparents. She’s a wonderful and loving child. There are so many people that Savannah has touched during her encounters with the world, and she has left a smile on all their faces. Just know that they have such a kind spirit and faces each day full of joy and bravery.
Jolene Schmitt (Grandmother)
Thanks so much for visiting, Jolen. It’s always a wonderful experience to meet other families of these special people. I especially enjoyed seeing all of you gathered together to support your special girl that night. I look forward to seeing you again.
It never ceases to amaze me how many “friends” we make when we go out with our son Josh! He wants to give hugs, and share smiles, with everyone he meets. One of my biggest “fears” after learning Josh had Ds was how he would be treated in the future…especially when he started school. We loved him so much and wanted to protect him from everything “bad” in the world (almost to where I didn’t want take him home from the “safe” hospital). Josh has taught us so much over the last 5 years…most importantly that we worry way too much about him. He is in KNDGN this year and he loves it. His special ed & mainstream classroom teachers both say that the kids love Josh…and I know he loves being around them as well. I know he is at the age where “acceptance” is easier and there will be many “acceptance” challenges in the future. However, he is making a great start for himself. I cannot count the number of times he has “made someone’s day” just by being…himself! It makes me SO proud to be his mom (and makes me feel a little silly for thinking he wouldn’t have any friends when he started school)!
Nathan is such a little “flirt” with the ladies – and rarely meets any strangers. If you ever visit our church, don’t sit behind us if you want to concentrate, because he’ll do his best to be a friendly distraction. 🙂